Elderly Lady Who Clings To Me
An elderly lady of 86 years old. She is a spinster.All the years of her life , she stays all alone.
I know her for past 20 over years.
I came to know her as one of elderly church goer who had some knee problem.As such I helped to get an appointment to consult an orthopaedician.
After that encounter, she became a friend n always drop by at my home and follows me after the mass for breakfast occasionally.
Since then, I use to drop by her place to check all is well for her and assist her where I can and when I had the time.
Trust me, she is one strong, determined and independent lady ever I have come across in my life time.
However recently, she became confused n disoriented after a fall from bicycle due to hypoglycaemia.
As such me and her niece and nephew in overseas advised her to stay in nursing home.In fact organised Little Sisters of Poor in Penang by the help of local church.
She was very reluctant to move into the nursing home because she was so use to the independent of living and going to miss the freedom she had.
However she moved in after weighing the positive reasoning of us for security and assistance in case anything happened due to old age.Thus finally she moved in three months back to the nursing home.
However she was unable to adjust to the nursing home and everyday she cry over it during the chat with her.So there was tug of war between her and the sisters looking after her.
The nuns unable to cope with hard and tough attitude of not giving in to the nursing home way of living.This landed her being short changed to another home.
This further upset and caused anxiety to the old independent lady.
As such after in depth discussion with her relative one nephew at UK n another niece at Australia.We came to the conclusion her happiness at old age is important.As such best to move her back to her old flat and let her lead the independent life which she longs.
Thus she was taken from the nursing home and sent back to her flat.
Temporarily while waiting for the flat to refurbished with basic daily living requirements and her meals arranged to be deliver to her home.She is living at her friend’s place.
She is a one strong lady who clings to me and teaches me life at old age.
Dear Naga , senior citizens always would like to spend their twilight years in their old house or condo or apartment and do not mind leading lonely life with people like you and like minded would give solace to their mind by visits or telephone call and one sentence How R You would make them happy .
ReplyDeleteMoral: Love and inclusiveness and not leave them alone for days and months .
You are such a nice soul to be her friend and cater…...
ReplyDeleteIt's a moral dilemma taking care of the elderly.
ReplyDeleteIf they are in full mental faculty, the best place would be in a place they are familiar with, surrounded by caring friends and loving families.
Dilemma we face will be when they start to deteriorate rmentally and physically.
Society expects that the children have filial piety and take care of our parents.
In our present small nuclear family with children and in laws working far away, it's quiet impossible to take full care of the aged. Paying for home nursing rm 30.00 per hour for 8 hours per day is beyond most people's means.
if they are confused and bed bound, it's uncaring and unloving to leave them alone at home while the children are at work. Unless the children are willing to quit their job and not all have the luxury to do such.
They need a safe place. The best place to be would be a nursing home.
Old people are orientated to the normal routine.... Even though they have some disorientation issues.
ReplyDeleteHowever they feel pleased with they old environment. What we did for my mum after my dad's demise a nurse to check on her medication 3 times a day and a lady to as friend/maid/cook with her 24hrs .
Friday's I ll visit and back to Pg on Sundays. My brothers to visit when ever they are back from work.
My sister from Florida twice a year.
My elders sister from Adelaide 4 months continuesly during her last day of live. The youngest brother came back from Alabama whom she missed so much. 2 days later she departed peacefully. All the six of us was there with her.
What I have learned was so useful in giving her the best.